As some of you may know, I had 5 years of solid sobriety starting on 2009. However, in 2014 I drank again. My relapse lasted a very long time. A long 2+ years, in fact. As difficult as it was to be stuck in those 700+ days of hell, now I know that every day was needed. Every single one. Why do I say this? Well…my story today comes from getting down and dirty with my disease during that time. As hard as I tried to get sober again through meetings and my beloved 12-steps, I could NOT do it. I tried everything. I KNEW I had to let my Higher Power do what I couldn’t do for myself, but it was just not happening. I would go to meetings, call my sponsor, do the steps…and I could only score a month
And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.